Tuesday, August 26, 2008
This very funny parody of Juno received a prestigious award from George Lucas at Comic Con 2008.
© Copyright Evil Genius Entertainment 2008
Thursday, August 21, 2008
CHULA VISTA, Calif. — A police officer who sued the City of Chula Vista two years ago for the right to compete in a beauty pageant has now been placed on paid leave in a dispute over a $17,000 engagement ring.
Officer Deanna Michelle Mory’s former fiancé Brian Callahan, a soldier in Iraq, alleges the ring was stolen after the couple broke up.
Prosecutors declined to file theft charges, but a city hearing over the allegation is set for Aug. 29 and Mory was placed on leave.
Mory, who was named Ms. California in January 2006, sued the city after police administrators told her to stop competing in pageants.
Sunday, August 17, 2008
After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my drivers license to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at home.
I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and come back later.
The woman said, “Unbutton your shirt.”
So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair. She said, “That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me,” and she processed my Social Security application.
When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the Social Security office. She said, “You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten disability, too.”
And then the fight started.
My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion and I kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a nearby table.
My wife asked, “Do you know her?” “Yes,” I sighed, “She’s my old girlfriend. I understand she took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear she hasn’t been sober since.”
“My God!” says my wife. “Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?”
And then the fight started.
I rear ended a car this morning. So, there we were alongside the road and slowly the other driver got out of his car.
You know how sometimes you just get soooo stressed and little things just seem funny? Yeah, well I couldn’t believe it…. he was a DWARF!!!
He stormed over to my car, looked up at me, and shouted, “I AM NOT HAPPY!!!”
So, I looked down at him and said, “Well then, which one are you?”
And then the fight started…
A woman is standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror. She is not happy with what she sees and says to her husband, “I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly. I really need you to pay me a compliment.”
The husband replies, “Your eyesight’s damn near perfect.”
And then the fight started.
Monday, August 11, 2008
Part of Olympics Fireworks Display Faked
By Samuel Spencer
One of the key parts of the Beijing Olympics opening ceremony, watched by over an estimated 3 billion people around the world, was faked, a report in a Chinese newspaper has revealed.
A part of the ceremony broadcast on TV, which seemed to display giant footprints in the sky lit up by fireworks, were a computer animation that had been prepared for more than a year.
The setup was so elaborate and well planned that even giant television screens inside the stadium broadcast the fake images.
The faked animation was revealed in The Beijing Times in an interview with the head of the ceremony’s visual effects, Gao Xiaolong. Despite the subterfuge, Gao said he was pleased with the results. “Most of the audience thought it was being shown live, so that was mission accomplished,” he said in the interview.
Gao said it had taken his team a year to create the 55-second sequence.
Gao revealed that it would have been impossible to film the footage live, given the smog and the weather, and would have involved carefully maneuvering a helicopter to see all 29 footsteps in a row.
The team talked to the Beijing meteorological office so as to recreate the haze from Beijing’s night sky, and also inserted a camera-shake effect to make it appear as if it was filmed from a helicopter.
The dupe was made possible by the fact that it was done under the aegis of the Beijing Olympic Broadcasting, which controls and provides the main video feeds of all Olympics events to other channels, which in turn feed the video to all around the world. This includes NBC, which has the U.S. broadcasting contract.
Copyright © Epoch Times Staff 2000–2008
Friday, August 01, 2008
The Above Powerball Winner on Vacation
Redneck Yacht
You Might Be A Redneck If...
A little rain doesn't spoil the fishing
You need fashion tips from your husband
You wear a shirt like this for your engagement picture...
And your wedding cake looked like this...
Your doghouse looks like this..
You have a deer's butt for a door bell...
You don't need a lake to do a little skiing...
Or if your wife is quoted in the local paper saying...